Weak, but not for long

Let this awful moment be documented so that I will remember it.

I think I finally know why I'm such an advocate of the single life and being independent and man free. Or at least one of the reasons. It's because the feeling of liking someone can be really self depreciating and it changes the way you see yourself.

And I'm not even talking about full on love. Just something as simple as a crush. When you realize how awesome that someone is... you come to the realization of how horribly you fare in comparison. The word is 'lacking'. It makes you feel inadequate. For example not being muscular enough, not tall enough, not good looking enough, not having the best character or personality. It's almost like your flaws are being highlighted by a giant spot light.

And I'm normally not that self conscious. I'm actually confident with how I look and my personality.
I know it sounds stupid, and I do think it's stupid, but I can't help but feel that way. Whenever you see someone better than you, doesn't it make you feel somewhat inferior?

OK this is stupid. I'm happy with everything I have and I should be contented.

All this self doubt just because I have been checking out the fb profiles of the hot instructor and all the elite plu hotties in the country. They're all gorgeous and going to pool parties and stuff. It's amazing how much you can see on Facebook.

OK that's it. I'm done feeling bad. It's stupid. I know I'm hot haha. And I'm proud of my character, the way I was raised, my strengths when it comes to dealing with obstacles, how I stay focused.

I feel a strong connection to this song and video. It's about dealing with your personal journey and beating the darkness.