Joe... Again

I know it's annoying how I keep blogging about him. You guys must be sick of me going on and on with this. But understand that it isn't that easy to get over someone, especially when I haven't had any kind of closure or means to move on.

It's the end of the month, he is still very much someone that I yearn for. The feelings linger. But I'm feeling much better now. Keeping the crazy to a minimum.

Haven't seen him since Monday. Didn't see him at the gym on Wednesday or today. Wonder if he went on Thursday or Friday instead. I miss him. Even if he doesn't look at me or feel anything for me, at least seeing him makes me feel better. Or worse. It depends. But not seeing him at all is surely worst.

His eyes. His shaved head. The sound of his breath when he's sprinting. His sweat drenched shirt. That strained look on his face as he lifts that amazingly heavy barbell. His cool, calm demeanor when he just sits there resting between sets. The way we look into each others eyes, albeit briefly. His humility, shyness and reserved personality, which is something you don't expect from someone so macho and good looking. His bulging chest and biceps. His long and surprisingly skinny legs haha. His slightly tanned skin, which implies he's an outdoorsy type. The overall impression that he's in the military or some kind of uniformed body.

So many things remind me of him. Like the movie G.I. Joe. It's stupid I know. By my count, I've dreamed of him 4 times already. That's a record! Not sure how long the fantasy will last, but I secretly hope it won't end even though it's killing me.



XOXO